William Regal was ogling a picture of the Queen when WWE Champion Randy Orton popped into the office. He put over the events of last week before saying he felt that Regal should make the decision for Cyber Sunday, not the fans. He said he was going to compete tonight but so should the ‘rogues’ looking to challenge him for his belt. He offered up an idea for Triple threat match. Regal thought only briefly before excusing himself to go make a major announcement.
The opening credits ran and the pyro hit. Raw is live from the UK.
Regal’s music hit and he came out to a pretty big pop. Regal had some fun with the crowd before putting over how wonderful it was to be back home. He said he was promising them a great show this weekend. He said the WWE Champion likes to do things in threes, so that’s what he’ll get. He’d be facing all three opponents for Cyber Sunday TONIGHT. First to get a crack at Orton is Jeff Hardy.
Jeff Hardy v. Randy Orton
Orton came out to the ramp and gave a menacing glare in the direction of Raw GM William Regal.
Hardy and Orton circled up before locking horns. Hardy caught a quick arm drag, catching the champ off guard. They locked up again and this time Orton backed him into the corner with his strength and began hammering away on the quicker Hardy. Orton whipped Hardy only to miss the follow up in the corner and eat two arm drags.
Orton fought out of a headlock but found himself making the same mistake twice, missing another bull rush in the corner before getting clotheslined to the floor. Hardy hit his crazy dive and both are on the floor.
****Commercial****
We came back to Orton being in control with a side headlock. Hardy used the crowd to rally him but he was cut off by a big Orton power slam for the two count. Orton stomped on Hardy before hitting him with a body slam and a few knee drops for a near fall.
Orton slapped the chin lock on again before Hardy again rallied and back dropped Orton to cause a brief stalemate. Hardy picked up the pace with some clotheslines and then hit whisper in the wind for a great near fall. Hardy connected with the mule kick and then the double drop kick in the corner, leaving the champion in trouble. Hardy scaled the top rope before Kennedy showed up to briefly distract Hardy.
Orton knocked Hardy off the apron and then planted him with an RKO for the win.
Winner: Randy Orton via pin fall
JR and King put over Cyber Sunday some before letting us know Orton gets Kennedy later. He’ll also have to take on HBK in the main event.
****Commercial****
Santino Marella v. Val Venis
Santino’s got a mic. Yes.
Santino said he misses Europe very much and the only thing more beautiful than Europe was Maria. He said England couldn’t compare to Italy and asked why people were so upset. He realized that everyone must’ve seen the Condemned with Steve Austin. Val Venis’ music hit and we’ve got a match.
Santino tried to get the jump but Val caught him and beat him back with a ton of strikes. Marella got caught with a back elbow but was able to knock Venis into the corner and stomp away on the knee.
Marella kept on the leg slapping on a nasty looking leg lock before it evolved into a nice looking half crab. Val struggled, but was able to get to the ropes to break the hold. Val fought back with some chops, but Marella went back to the legs with some kicks before twisting the leg up once more.
Val kicked him off and then caught Marella with a gut shot before knocking him down with some punches and a double ace handle. Santino hit a back elbow and reversed a sunset flip attempt. Santino grabbed the ropes and got the win.
Winner: Santino Marella via pin fall
A Diva Search update aired next.
****Commercial****
Coach was in the back with Carlito. Carlito made fun of him for his handling of Hornswaggle. Coach said he thought that deep down inside, Vince didn’t want him to take care of Hornswaggle, he wanted him to get rid of him. He just needed to get him in the right place tonight to do it. Hornswaggle popped up stole the apple from Coach and ran off. Carlito pointed to the door and Coach went running after him.
Hornswaggle is still being chased by Coach. They ran through the kitchen where Hornswaggle tossed some food and ran.
A video aired putting over Umaga’s destruction of Triple H last week.
Vince is in the back with William Regal. Vince wanted to know how old the queen was. Really. Vince congratulated Regal on his match making skills but was remise over the fact that Triple H wasn’t here. Vince made fun of Regal’s accent and mispronunciation of Umaga. He said he’d be impressed by Umaga’s demonstration later tonight.
****Commercial****
Randy Orton v. Mr. Kennedy
The bell rang and the two circled it up and locked horns. Kennedy grabbed a headlock but had it quickly reversed by the champion. Orton grappled with an overhand wrist lock but Kennedy tried a roll up for a fast two count.
Kennedy hit a shoulder block for a one count before grabbing that headlock again. Orton fought out and began pummeling Kennedy as the action moved to the corner. Kennedy side stepped Orton’s drop kick for another quick near fall before he took control with some nasty looking punches.
Orton swung back and hit some nasty European uppercut. Orton put the Garvin Stomp to Kennedy’s face before laying him out with the inverted back breaker. Kennedy came firing back with his crucifix bomb, but wasn’t able to capitalize because Jeff Hardy, who Kennedy caught earlier tonight, nailed him with a drop kick to cause the DQ.
Winner: Ken Kennedy via DQ
Jeff Hardy hit a swanton bomb on Orton for fun and went to town on both heels, leaving himself as the only guy in the ring.
****Commercial****
Vince McMahon’s music hit the arena and it’s time for a little Vince-sanity.
Vince put over Cyber Sunday as a WWE fan’s dream come true. He said at Cyber Sunday, it’s be Triple H against Umaga. He introduced Umaga to the crowd and the belt eating maniac came down to the ring and stepped into the ring. One of the stipulations we’d be able to choose from would be a street fight. Poor Andy Simmons is in a street fight. Simmons gave an ‘oh no’ as the bell rang. Priceless.
Umaga beat him stupid. Umaga choked him, tossed him over the announce table and then hit a Samoan drop onto a steel chair. That’s fun. Um, this is a match? As they dragged Simmons from the ring, we found out we could also choose a first blood match. Simmons looked like he was going to die.
And die he did. Umaga hit the running head butt before setting up the running ass to the head. Vince ordered him to finish the job. Umaga hit like six hundred and fifty-three Samoan spikes to the kid’s throat and he’s bleeding out the mouth. Holy crap.
There is blood on Umaga’s thumb. A thing of beauty. Vince told them to drag him off. Then he stopped them and offered up the third stipulation, a steel cage match. This poor, poor kid.
Cage match time. Umaga tossed the kid into the cage like a lawn dart as Vince asked for more. Umaga hit the tilt a whirl side slam and then just kept tossing him into the cage. Vince asked the officials to open the door and declared his man the winner.
****Commercial****
Hornswaggle rides past Ron Simmons in the back on a tricycle. Coach follows on a bike. The mandatory ‘damn’ of the night.
Jillian Hall v. Candice Michelle
Jillian called Lillian’s performance last week pathetic. Jillian said she could tell she was lip sinking. Jillian showed the bad footage. Jillian said Lillian’s band were fake musicians. Jillian said no one understand Spanish anyways. Jillian said a true singer was judged on how well they sang without a band. Jillian is going to sing acapella. Awesome. And in a language everyone can understand….. British.
Candice’s music interrupts rather rudely and we’ve got a match.
Jillian jumped her and tossed her across the ring by the hair. Candice avoided her in the corner and hit a take down followed by a wheel kick. Candice hit a hard kick to the but and a nasty un-prettier for the win. That was quick.
Winner: Candice Michelle via pin fall
Women’s Champion Beth Phoenix was in the back. She said Candice would get her rematch next week. She said being the glamazon means that you either get on your knees and worship her, or she makes you get down on your knees and worship her. She said next week she’d bring Candice to her knees. That can’t be too hard I wouldn’t think.
Hardcore Holly asked Cody Rhodes why he keeps on coming for more. He said he’d been beating people before half of him swam out of his daddy’s polka dots. Holly slapped the sh_t outta him and said that was the look he was lookin’ for.
****Commercial****
The Smackdown Rebound aired.
Brian Kendrick v. Rory McAllister
Cade & Murdoch are on commentary.
Kenrick and Rory started it off and of course the former Spanky is pin ballin’ everywhere. Rory flat backed Kendrick and stomped him silly before dropping the heavy bombs on Kendrick before dumping him to the outside.
Kendrick fought his way back into the ring before kicking out of a quick cover attempt. Rory slapped on a rear chin lock as Kendrick repeatedly tried to break the hold only to get cut off with knees.
Kendrick caught him charging in and hit a nice wheel kick before Robbie showed up and distracted him. London took case of him while Rory took advantage. Rory hit a nice reverse suplex and that’s that.
Winner: Rory via pin fall
The Highlanders had a stare down with Cade and Murdoch after the match.
****Commercial****
HBK gave an interview about how he was going to kick Randy Orton’s teeth down his throat. He might.
Hornswaggle gets chased into the Diva locker room by Coach. Then out. We get bionic code and now Hornswaggle has run out underneath the ring. Coach got a detonator out from under the ring. Here we go. This will rule. Coach tried to hit the switch several times but nothing’s happening. Coach went under the ring to find Horny, but he came shooting out the other side and saw the detonator in the ring. Hornswaggle blew Coach up.
****Commercial****
Cody Rhodes v. Hardcore Holly
Holly went to dump Cody before Cody skinned the cat. Holly caught him on the way back in and laid into him with some hard slaps. Cody fought back out of the corner before Holly began clubbing away at him.
Cody countered a clothesline attempt with a cross body before Holly began choking him out on the ropes and landing some stiff chops to his chest. Holly slapped on a rear chin lock as the crowd attempted to will Cody to his feet.
Cody hammered away at Holly’s midsection before getting cut off yet again. Holly went back to the ropes and hit his kick to the nuts. So fun. Cody countered the Alabama slam for the near fall and then caught a second roll up and a crucifix. Cody went for the back slide next but ended up eating a kick in the end. Holly missed a charge in the corner and went for a roll up but again couldn’t get the job done.
Holly nailed a standing drop kick before mounting the top turnbuckle. Holly came sailing off with a high cross body but Cody countered it for another near fall. Cody went for something off the top rope but Holly caught him in the Alabama Slam and killed him with it.
Winner: Hardcore Holly via pin fall
Orton and HBK are on their way to the ring.
****Commercial****
Randy Orton v. Shawn Michaels
Michaels came right at Orton and began beating the doo doo out of him. He chased Orton to the floor and kneed him right in the dome. Michaels dumped Orton back in and went for a quick roll up for a two count.
HBK hit some chops, keeping up the pressure. HBK seemed poised under the pressure, rolling out and almost getting another roll up attempt before Orton sprung up and killed him in the face with the old lariat-o. Orton pummeled HBK on the mat before picking him up and dumping him on the top rope. Orton went for a big time super plex but HBK put up a fight and finagled his way out of it.
HBK knocked Orton to the mat before uncorking the big elbow. HBK went to tune up the band before Kennedy jumped into the ring to cause the DQ.
Winner: HBK via DQ
Jeff Hardy ran down to make the save before Orton dumped him to the outside. Orton looked for the RKO but got shoved into Kennedy knocking him to the outside. Orton rebounded off the ropes and got nailed with sweet chin music.
HBK sat in the corner and smiled at Orton’s cold-cocked body on the mat
Quick Results:
- Randy Orton def. Jeff Hardy
- Santino Marella def. Val Venis
- Mr. Kennedy def. Randy Orton by DQ
- Candice Michelle def. Jillian Hall
- Rory McAllister def. Brian Kendrick
- Hardcore Holly def. Cody Rhodes
Main Event
- Shawn Michaels def. Randy Orton by DQ
Tue Oct 16, 2007 4:33 pm
